Most of the time, people become addicted to drugs or alcohol because they have a lot of pain inside. In some cases, addiction can be linked to trauma or a co-occurring mental disorder, but it can also be used as a way to deal with stress or emotions. A drink of wine or a joint won’t make you feel better, so you have to get sober instead. Fear of what life will be like when all the mind-altering substances and parties stop is a common reason people don’t want to get clean. Getting sober also means that you have to admit that you have a problem with drugs or alcohol, which can be scary for some people to do on its own.

The reality is that refraining from drinking or using drugs won’t change who you are. The essence and true beauty inside of you remain the same. You just have more self-control so you aren’t constantly making a fool out of yourself anymore. Embrace sober firsts The temptation when faced with Foma is to cancel your social life until further notice and/or you’ve worked out how not to drink without feeling like a total loser.

Treatment Facilities

For more information about Suboxone (buprenorphine/naloxone) see Suboxone.com, the full Prescribing Information, and Medication Guide, or talk to your healthcare provider. You are encouraged to report negative side effects of drugs to the FDA. Fear of recovery not working and that https://ecosoberhouse.com/article/why-we-have-a-fear-of-being-sober-5-fears-about-it/ you will return to use is real. In fact, for many of us returning to use is a reality of recovery. By its very nature, substance use disorder is referred to as a relapsing condition. I would much rather fail and keep trying than stay stuck on a one-way path to destruction.

The mindset that tells you that you are worth the effort is the mindset that gives you the energy to do something about it. My belief that I wasn’t addicted enough to take action was fuelled by the fear of facing reality along with being externally motivated. I’ve always been a people pleaser because that boosts my self-esteem. I’ve always put others first and thought, well, if everyone else is okay, it doesn’t really matter if I’m okay or not. I felt the thrill of getting away with something I shouldn’t be doing as well as feeling the dopamine hit of whatever sugary snack I’d just darted back to my bedroom with. As a 33-year-old construction supervisor with a partner, mortgage and baby on the way, I felt the same way, but this time about drinking and doing cocaine.

Learning Center

Some people manage to get there faster than others, but it’s not a competition. Depending on the severity of your drinking problem and resulting behavior, some bridges may be forever burned. Some people may want nothing to do with you, no matter how much you change.

• In Season 1, it’s pounding shots and dancing on a bar to Shakira, feeling like a sex goddess despite looking like the opposite.
• It is common for people to have a fear of sobriety, especially if they have been struggling with addiction for a long time.
• I didn’t want anyone to know if I was drinking or not drinking, and I definitely didn’t want it to be the topic of conversation.
• It wasn’t until well into my sobriety that I thought, “this is for me.” During my first year of sobriety it was just something I was doing, not drinking.
• When I first quit drinking I wanted everything in my life to stay exactly the same.
• You just need to remember that it isn’t true and don’t take the look or comment personally.

But remember that anyone who truly cares about you will always come back. When you’re sober, you’ll be able to form more meaningful, long-term friendships that aren’t based on alcohol-based interactions. As we get mature, we need to learn healthy ways to deal with the pain and difficulties that life can throw at us. For most of those seeking recovery, this will be one of the most real fears they have when they get sober because the pain inside can be very scary.

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Fear of pain keeps people drinking for far too long. I knew this because of the way I would use drugs and alcohol differently from others. In my early 20s, when I was taking a lot of speed, my friends would use drugs and alcohol to enhance their experience, but it was a little different for me. I remember sitting in the backyard of our share house on a Saturday afternoon. We’d all be drinking and having a good time. Soon enough, we’d all start taking speed to turn things up a notch.

Support groups such as Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) are all great support networks to help you if you might be struggling. Although a lot of work, try to change your perspective so you can count all the positives that come with missing out versus being in places that might hurt your chances of sobriety. One of the greatest fears of going to rehab is relapse — a sign of “failure.” However, relapse is so common that it’s considered a part of lifelong recovery for some people.

Months of Sobriety- The Rebuild Week 13

This is the hard part, but it’s also the most rewarding. When you do start to deal with your problems in healthier ways (and you will), you are going to feel completely transformed and unstoppable. In fact, here’s a little secret – anyone who is charming drunk can be charming sober. After you’re more secure in your sobriety, you’ll find that you’re actually MORE charming than “drunk you” could ever be.

Leaving only Tuesday and Wednesday to be sober. All I wanted to do was feel as far removed as possible from the stresses of my day-to-day life. I just wanted to sit there and not feel the things I felt when I was sober. I didn’t have a lot of interest in busy public places or large social gatherings.

The truth is, you have no idea what success will look or feel like. Spending mental energy on things you cannot possibly know is useless. Every time you (or I) do that, we choose to suffer.

It is very normal in the early days to feel like you’ve resigned yourself to a life of misery by quitting alcohol. Those early days of sobriety may leave you feeling hopeless. In fact, this fear personally led to a dozen failures in my own sobriety journey. Many of us drink because we need something to turn down the volume of the toxic shame parade running through our brains.

What’s stopping you from getting sober? Is it fear of failure? Fear of being judged?

Once you are sober, you’ll be able to have confidence enough to stand up for yourself. You can speak truth to those people’s lives and no longer let it dictate who you are. If you’re one of the 3.1 million Brits who have just embarked on a Dry January, you’re probably already in the grip of Foma. Sober shaming could happen at any point in day-to-day life. However, there are some environments where this might be more prominent or noticeable. “Many people – 5 million in the UK – have mild or moderate alcohol dependency,” says Richard Piper, chief executive of Alcohol Change.